Why RSE Is So Important For Learners With SEND
Rachael Baker, SEND Specialist RSE Consultant for Split Banana
July, 2025
I have been working in relationships and sex education (RSE) for 18 years and in that time have come to realise that RSE is the most important subject we teach in schools. However great a set of GCSEs learners leave with, what they learn in RSE becomes their passport to independent adulthood, giving them the skills to navigate interactions with others, to understand themselves and empowering them to make good choices. It is life skills in the purest form.
Thanks to robust statutory government RSE guidance since 2019, and the determination of RSE teachers across the country, young people report that they are happier with their RSE provision now than in the past few years (1), and that 50% of learners now rate their RSE as good or very good, up from 35% in 2021 (2). However, people with learning disabilities still report that RSE is not meeting their needs (3), and continues to be too focused on reproduction and protecting from risk, rather than giving practical rights-based skills to navigate their sexuality when they are old enough and ready.
There is a misconception that people with a learning disability would not want or would not be able to consent to a sexual relationship, however that is not the case for the majority. People with learning disabilities are likely to be sexual, to want to have intimate relationships and to want to cohabit with a partner. However, people with learning disabilities often report that they feel that people assume they would not want these things, and find that RSE focuses more on keeping them safe than giving them skills to navigate their adult relationships.
There is a tension for RSE educators in SEND settings, because people with learning disabilities are more vulnerable to all forms of abuse at all stages of life, however we also must not frame sex and relationships in a negative way, and make the subject all about avoiding risk. People with learning disabilities are also highly vulnerable to poor mental health, isolation and loneliness, and having the skills to form friendships and relationships, and to maintain and navigate those relationships is a powerful tool in overcoming these adversities. Forming relationships and friendships are a right, and learners with SEND need the education and skills to be able to enjoy their rights.
So, what do learners with SEND need? ‘SEND’ is a vast description that covers anyone with an education healthcare plan, ranging from a learner who needs some additional provision in mainstream, to a learner with profound and multiple disabilities and highly complex needs, so the belief is that there isn’t a one-size-fits-all answer.
Well, actually we think there is… learners with SEND, just like everyone else, need RSE that is appropriate to their age and delivered in a way that enables them to access the learning, is meaningful to them and their interests and questions, and is planned based on assessment of their prior learning.
The key phrase for me in terms of planning RSE for learners with SEND is age-appropriate. In primary school, age-appropriate understandably means ‘not telling the tiny children things they are not ready for’ and it does mean that, of course. However, as learners get older, and particularly in SEND settings when a learner might be working far below age-related expectations, age-appropriate flips and takes on a new meaning. Age-appropriate means teaching content that is appropriate to the learner’s chronological age, but in a way that enables them to access it at their developmental level. That is the challenge, the art, to take quite grown-up concepts like puberty, intimacy, sex, pleasure, consent and so on, and deliver them in such a way that the learner can fully access the learning, and that the learning matters to them and has meaning.
What does this look like in the classroom? In a mainstream classroom, this might mean a differentiated lesson plan with personalised learning activities for some learners, or if you are lucky enough to have a teaching assistant, that this person is placed with a small group who need additional support. In a class of learners with moderate learning disabilities in a SEND school this might mean that the same topic is being explored in very different ways around the room, to cater for individual needs or interests. In a learning environment for learners with profound and multiple learning disabilities (PMLD), learning might be sensory and tactile, delivered in a creative and personalised way. Whichever setting we are in, the fundamentals are the same – what can my learner do already? What do they need to know? How do they learn? What are they interested in?
I work with teachers and educators, and regularly get asked what should we be teaching? When should we teach that? What do I do if the learning outcome in the guidance is too complex for my learners? RSE has many complex topics, but most are rooted in the basics of consent and touch, public and private, and basic understanding of the body.
I like to use a ladder as an analogy in RSE, climbing from the basic concept to the most aspirational content on the top rung. For every topic we need to consider what those incremental steps are to get to that aspirational learning, and assess our learners to find out which rung they are on, gradually climbing the ladder with them as they are ready. Even enormously complex topics such as forced marriage, or pornography can be differentiated using this method. In a mainstream class we might be talking about ethics around pornography, or links to sexual violence, but in the SEND classroom we might be on the very first rungs, talking about how we do not look at other people’s private body parts, or watch people doing private activities, or take photos of people without their clothes on. Yes, those are far removed from the aspirational learning at the top of the ladder, but you simply cannot teach that stuff at the top without a solid foundation of the basics at the bottom.
In SEND schools, and with learners with SEND, we should expect that there will be some who need some extra support around RSE themes, and be proactive about identifying those pockets of need, and creative in how we address them. It might be that a small group could do with some extra content around friendship skills, or recognising positive and negative relationships. An individual might need some extra work to understand masturbation, or public and private. We might need to pull together a small group from across classes or year groups to give the learners the personalised curriculum they need. We can be creative, and personalise our offer to meet individual needs.
I am absolutely delighted to be part of the team at Split Banana, and to bring my experience of working in SEND schools to the organisation. I believe that quality RSE is every learner’s right, and it is our privilege as educators to bring that to them. I am so pleased to be here to support the RSE community to make RSE for your learners with SEND as good as it can be, and can’t wait to see where that takes us.
Rachael Baker
Rachael Baker is a SEND specialist relationships and sex education consultant. A qualified teacher and experienced SEND practitioner, Rachael works with teachers and educators to develop their RSE provision, to deliver meaningful and age-appropriate RSE to learners with SEND, and to address sexualised behaviour with dignity.
Rachael has joined the Split Banana team to support the design of their first year-long training programme to develop outstanding RSE leads in specialist schools.
(1) Sex Education Forum Young people's RSE poll 2024
(2) Sex Education Forum Young people's RSE poll 2021
(3) Brown, M., Linden, M., Marsh, L. et al. Learning for life, friendships and relationships from the perspective of children and young people with intellectual disabilities: findings from a UK wide qualitative study. BMC Public Health 24, 2491 (2024).
(4) Mencap Sexuality research and statistics
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